I often wonder if I am ruining my kids. If what I am doing will make them crazy later on? Or damaged in some way. I mean, I am no expert at this, raising kids, or even “life” in general. I am flying through it without experience or education.
I really don’t know what the hell I am doing.
But, I really hope that the will come out ok… that what I am teaching them is normal, that most people think, and do things this way.
With my son, especially. He seems to need extra, tweaks and adjustments.
Especially his latest “learning” where I taught him to talk to himself.
Like, in his own head.
And yes, I told him its okay if he answers himself back as well.
I remember very little from when I was 6 years old, so I don’t know if I talked a lot, or made the constant and copious amounts of noise my son does. From the moment he wakes there is barely a minute that goes by that SOUND doesn’t come out of him.
Not just words, or sentences, but songs, and noises, and all sorts of variations of things that make no sense at all.
After the summer months of being subjected to this constant stream of NOISE I had a light bulb moment.
The reason HIS noise bothers me so much is because it interferes with MY NOISE.
My “in my head” noise.
(And this is the part of the story where I tell you that yes, I DO talk to myself” and you tell me “Never worry Julie, that is TOTALLY normal”)
I am constantly talking to myself, even as I write this, I am saying it, and adding commentary. I have a running dialogue of conversations, ideas, plans, and situations in my brain, and not just the ones things that we are worried about, but the mundane.
In fact, the noise in MY head gets so bad sometimes I put on earphone and music just to drown myself out.
So, for me, I figured if I taught him how to do take this external noise and make in internal.. it would be a win for me, and win for him (we are much better conversationalists in our head) and a win for the ENTIRE WORLD (you can thank me later)
But then I worried, what if this is NOT a good thing? What if this is breaking him?
But after a few conversations with myself I figured it would do more good than harm. I find HUGE value in my brain chats. I get to figure stuff out, make decisions and usually have every possible experience planned out before participating. Now, this whole “talking to myself” thing may have made me a bit of an introvert, but at least I am never lonely.
I guess we will need to wait and see what happens, but until then, at least the house is a little quieter.